That feeling of helplessness from having a body and mind that’s not at their best. I feel inept, incapable of doing anything or even think about anything. Focus is just plain gone.
The only thing left to do, is to endure, and recover. And you know what they say about the sick needing to rest and recover? Bullshit seriously, how do you rest (via sleep) when you can only sleep 4-5 hours a night? The rest of my night was spent coughing or in a state of mild delirium dreaming about being in the fantasy books I read. (You are what you read, literally.)
Having a nasty flu/sore throat/headache/fever combi (and a stye on my left eye area right before) was no walk in the park. It’s been more than a week since I last felt fully healthy. It sounds strange, but getting back to work has helped somewhat, because I had something else to focus on outside of feeling sorry for myself at home. Of course, I was a phlegm machine with a hacking cough all day long, spitting it up and out whenever I had a chance.
Maybe that’s how getting old will be like. Thankful to be on the road to recovery right now, that is all!