About that damn knee.

For the past month or so, it’s felt like my left knee’s kinda fucked. There’d be moments when I feel that loss of support, that alarming feeling when something you’ve relied on all your life, suddenly gives way for an instant. I feel like lateral movements are a gamble. And my left knee feels shaky, shakier than it used to be.

And that flash of pain that surprises more than it hurts, and then it’s gone.

One physio says, no ligament damage he can feel. One GP says, feels mostly fine, other than possible strain. Why then, do I still feel like it’s not doing well? Maybe it’s a mental thing.

MRI scan tomorrow, hopefully it’s all good.

It’s time to lay on the rehab exercises hard – gotta be more religious about this shit.

The thing I hate most about being sick?

That feeling of helplessness from having a body and mind that’s not at their best. I feel inept, incapable of doing anything or even think about anything. Focus is just plain gone.

The only thing left to do, is to endure, and recover. And you know what they say about the sick needing to rest and recover? Bullshit seriously, how do you rest (via sleep) when you can only sleep 4-5 hours a night? The rest of my night was spent coughing or in a state of mild delirium dreaming about being in the fantasy books I read. (You are what you read, literally.)

Having a nasty flu/sore throat/headache/fever combi (and a stye on my left eye area right before) was no walk in the park. It’s been more than a week since I last felt fully healthy. It sounds strange, but getting back to work has helped somewhat, because I had something else to focus on outside of feeling sorry for myself at home. Of course, I was a phlegm machine with a hacking cough all day long, spitting it up and out whenever I had a chance.

Maybe that’s how getting old will be like. Thankful to be on the road to recovery right now, that is all!

A sneezy Sunday.

Do you get annoyed at how hay fever absolute tears your life into little meaningless pieces? I do. The nose felt so awful, I could not bloody concentrate on any single task at all for the entire day. Hate. Hay. Fever. Days like these make me feel like I should have an option to tear my nose off or something.

Should I be happy I’m finally feeling much better at 2am in the morning? I guess I should be; at the very least, I will be sleeping in relative peace.

Happy birthday once again to my nephew Kayden who just turned one, and enjoy your Chinese New Year, all you folks in Singapore who are still on the happy holiday mode.

The 90-percent ankle.

So I sprained my ankle last year November, and it’s still not back in tip top condition yet. It hurts if I push the ankle to its limit, but otherwise works fine. That makes it a little hard for me to do crossovers or quick changes of direction on the court.

For a first ever ankle sprain of the slightly more serious magnitude, this is getting a little annoying. I’m suspecting that scar tissue has formed with recovery, and it’s going to limit my movement in the long run. Which sucks.

Time to stretch, stretch and stretch that ankle.

Of how everything is a sight for sore eyes.

I meant that literally.

A not so wonderful side benefit about this newly developed hay fever: my eyes are allowed to be sore and dry all the time. There’s a constant urge to rub them, they feel irritated more than half the time and I am feeling so damn tired because my eyes feel like half the dust from my neighbourhood just went into them. I could probably draw maps and name deserts in my eyeballs at this point.

No excuses though, life still goes on. So it’s just eye drops to the rescue when the eyeballs feel like they’re about to come off, and off we go once more, back into the fold.

I had a quick look into hay fever treatment, and the standard course of “treatment” goes something like this. Eye drops for irritated eyes, anti-histamines for the runny nose, and try to stay indoors.

You know, that sounds exactly like my life for the past month. Screw “treatment”.

The itch to ball.

Good news: my ankle’s healing. Walking’s fine, don’t think running’s a problem either.

Not so good news: it’s not at 100% yet. Slightly swollen, and it’s feeling a little sore after a walk earlier.

What this means: No ball yet again. Damn, I’ve sat out for two, three weeks already. I want to test things out tomorrow morning and see how badly everything’s deteriorated but the damn stadium’s closed.

Ah well, maybe Tuesday. In the meantime, it’s all about getting more sleep.